L is for line. Not the one you wait in, but
the one drawn between yes and no.
Whether it is a figurative line in the sand
or fence of barbed wire, the line exists to forbid crossing. Would it were a
concrete vision! Would it were touchable and clearly marked with yellow crime
scene tape. But often the line is no black stripe of permanent ink. It snakes
somewhere between the unstated and understated, shifting and elusive as the
borealis, and yet...should foot or finger cross it, a resulting electrified
jolt leaves an intruder in no doubt of its reality.
‘Boundaries’ was the catch word of the
nineties on the psychological self help shelves. “Build thy emotional fences
and signpost them well with keep out warnings” was the solid advice. The lines in
the sand were already there, it seemed practical to erect a fearsome wall upon
them just in case. The resultant, exultant Me/Myself/I enshrined in castle and
determined to defend all rights to the death could then peer at another over
the battlement wall and perhaps wave sometimes.
Tip-toeing along the line is an art-form of
diplomacy. Hopefully your rights and my rights mesh neatly at the border. But
what if they don’t . Wherever they overlap, someone’s toe has toed past the line.
Where is the line in our relationship? Am I
dependant upon you or free? Do you need me or tolerate me? Is a relationship a
crutch or a support? Where is the line? At what point does interest become
obsession? At what junction does expectation cross responsibility?...
Perhaps what we need is a small office on
the border that will issue leave-passes – permission to cross the line without
fear of ending up in no-mans land. Perhaps we need to construct a safety net
underneath that long thin line. Perhaps instead of keeping it so taut and
uptight...we could give each other a little slack. After all being an island is
no fun, and nor is sitting arms crossed on the bottom line.
Looking for loopholes.
Long live love.
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| image from http://thomsondata.blogspot.com |
How about a tune..? This one jumped into my head and I kinda like it.
